A year

This year has been eventful. I don't think I accomplished all I wanted to, but things still happened, I'm not disappointed. 

I've reviewed my resolutions list from last December and I did decently on it.

When I was doing parkour classes there was a time I could see my abs, not a 6 pack or anything, but a flat stomach. Only for a few weeks though... And I still eat far too much sugar. Still working on that. Paying for dental work has been a huge incentive.

I wrote a short piece for my friend's Flash Fiction contest. 

I didn't keep a list of books, but I read a good many, including all the current A Song of Ice and Fire series. I don't think I really cut down much on internet time though. And I added video game time. Rather a lot of it.

During most of the summer, Liam and I hiked about once a week. We camped. I ran on my lunch breaks at work (sometimes.) And we walk daily with his dog. So I accomplished being outside. Still, not as much as I might like.

I have not found a new job, nor have I found a place with which to volunteer.

Too add to my year:

I went to a new country- Canada. Thus completing North America. I used my new passport with my new name.

I took a parkour class and learned the basics of the art so I can strive to be more healthy and fit. I also learned the benefit of minimal shoes even though I always knew I liked being barefoot. I now have 3 pairs: trainers, waterproof hikers and sandals.

I got a very decent raise at work.

I bought a PS3 and became addicted to Assassin's Creed.

Both my dog and my cat were euthanized. They were my childhood pets. I'd had my cat Patrick since the end of 2nd grade and I got Valerie when I was in 5th grade. They lived long lives and were much loved by everyone.

My 'phew and Blaze the golden retriever, Val the cattle dog and Patrick the boneless cat. 

I visited 10 (I think I counted correctly) National Parks after splitting an annual pass with two others. So worth it.

I hiked three 14ers. Hopefully many more this coming year!

I moved in with my boyfriend. It was a good decision. This has been my longest relationship, over two years! Hopefully many more.

So yes, an eventful year. Perhaps next year will be even more so.

As far as resolutions for the coming year, I want to climb at least four14ers.  I want to leave the country. I want to be able to consistently do 30 pushups and 15 pullups. I will also be keeping track of the books I read, I wish to read at least 12,000 pages. Shouldn't be a problem. And I wish to write. An average of 100 words a day. About anything. I am not holding myself to blogging every day or even writing unpublished things each day, but I wish to write more some days to make up for it.

Hold me to it?

Fandom Nostalgia

I've recently restarted communication with an old friend. This has made me remember all of the communication we'd had previously, when I first went to college. I decided to go read all those old email, because, yes, I keep all those sort of things. They made me very nostalgic. And they made me laugh a lot.

The creative emails were generally in script format (and thus not allowed on fanfiction.net). They featured Buc and I as well as a few other randoms from school. And many Lord of the Rings characters at random intervals.

We(she) made up heaps of acronyms about all sorts of things. The most memorable was for those crazy fans who know no reason. We called them RaiFs - Rabid and Insane Fangirls(and boys). They came in hordes whenever Legolas was featured and they screamed "Eeeeeeee" a lot. Lego-Lover was generally their leader. And based off another friend of ours. Example:

Lego-lover- LEGOLAS! there you are! I've been looking for you. You disappeared from my room!

Rabid and Insane Fangirls: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! ORLANDO BLOOM! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Legolas: *ponders* who is this Orlando Bloom I keep hearing about. *sees a pack of hungry wolf-like teenaged girls running at him full change and books it.*

RaiF:*have not taken a breath since they have arrived and are chasing Legolas* EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

*pass out.*

 *we are not quite sure if it was due from the lack of air or the sight of the "insanely hot guy from lotr and pirates of the Caribbean". we pronounce Caribbean as one word, four syllables. not "care a bee in" {Buc *grumbles at this pronunciation*} *

*when the fangirls faint  a cloud of dust poofs up and everything gets quiet*

Larz: *cough*

On the matter of naming our fandom correspondence:

Larz: *really fast*: inventive imaginary friendly gathering of friends that have technically never met except in our lord of the rings infested minds?

Buc: okaaay. how about we rearrange the letters to make it easier....

Glorfindel: mitmef gitrolf tofont hi. THAT is the name of this place. *looks smug*

Not all of our guests were from Lord of the Rings. There were some Star Wars characters and some from other random fandoms.

At one point we decided we needed to write alternate or deleted scenes from LOTR.

SCENE: Bag End

Frodo: (holds the ring towards the firelight and studies it.)

Gandalf: Can you see any markings on it? (looks a bit concerned)

Frodo: No. There is none. It is quite plain, and it never shows a scratch or sign of wear.

Gandalf: Well then, look! (snatches the ring and tosses it into the fire)

Frodo: (distressed, grabs for the tongs)

Gandalf: Wait! (holds Frodo back with one hand. after a bit takes the tongs from Frodo and picks the ring up out of the fire. holds it out towards Frodo.) It is quite cool, take it!

Frodo: (receives it on his shrinking palm)

Gandalf: Hold it up! And look closely!

Frodo: (holds it up and looks closely.) I cannot read the fiery letters, Gandalf. (shows Gandalf the ring.)

Gandalf: There are few who can. The letters are Elvish, of an ancient mode, but the language is that of Mordor which I will not utter here. But this in the common tongue is what is said, close enough: “insert finger here.”

SCENE: Rivendell interrogation room

Arwen: (leans on the table. forgets line…sneaks a peak at her script) What did you see?  You have the gift of foresight. What did you see?

Agent Elrond: I look into your future and I saw death. And asparagus. Slimy kind.

Arwen: But you also saw life. You saw there was a child. You saw my son. He wants me to have him!

Elrond: Oh yes… the asparagus child… That future is almost gone.

Arwen: But it is not lost. Wait. Did you just say asparagus child? You mean that cute little boy isn’t mine?

Elrond: Nothing is certain.

Arwen: Some things are certain. If I leave him now, I will regret it forever. It is time.

Elrond: Leave the asparagus child? I don’t get it.

Arwen: No, silly. Aragorn. What else did you see?

Elrond: I see dead people. And Aragorn, but he’s not dead…yet. Oh! And I even see Bruce Willis. 

SCENE: Gandalf and Pippin riding Shadowfax

Gandalf: (as they top the rise) Minas Tirith!

Pippin: It’s only a model.

Gandalf: (has a flash of future sight, you know, chaos and battle and death.) On second thought, let’s not go to Minas Tirith. It is a silly place. (wheels horse and gallops off.)

SCENE: Minas Tirith Citadel

Denethor: Can you sing Master hobbit?

Pippin: Well… yes. And dance. But we hobbits have no songs for great halls and dangerous times.

Denethor: Why should your songs not be fit for this hall? Sing master Hobbit!

Pippin: (sighs) Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen, nobody knows my sorrows...

Denethor: Try something with a little more bounce to it!

Pippin: There’s a lovely bunch of orcs and wargs, bum, bum, bum, standing in a row...

Denethor: bum, bum, bum... (swings his fork – wait! No, a piece of meat to the time)

Pippin: Big ones, small ones, some the size of your head! (under breath) I’d never have to do this if Aragorn were king.

Denethor: What did you say?

SCENE: Cracks of Doom

Frodo: (peers over the edge) I cannot do this thing. It is mine, my own, my precious!

Gollum: (sneaks in) NO! We wants it! Precioussss!

Frodo: You cannot have it!

Gollum: (in a deep voice) Frodo! I am your father!

Frodo: NO!!!!! (puts on the ring)

SCENE: THE CORONATION/WEDDING

Gandalf: (performing ceremony in a very monotone and obnoxious voice) Mawage! Mawage is wot bwings us togeva today! (and so forth. Finally turns to Frodo) Have you da wing?

Frodo: (looks around, confused.) You told me to cast it into the fire!

Aragorn: (angry) Where is the ring?

(chaos erupts)

  

So there you have it. Thanks for joining me on my silly nostalgic journey.

 

Holiday

I rather like that I will get paid quite a lot for working today. Holidays at work are always pretty easy. First, we don't have a time constraint because we don't open to the public. Second, we tend to get a lot of volunteers, so we have many people helping and the work goes quickly. Not always smoothly of course, some volunteers get rather territorial.

I yearn for a holiday that I can spend with my boyfriend. No more dealing with unsympathetic and even hostile family members. No more traveling and being apart.

I've spent this Christmas with Ezio, rebuilding Rome. 

Did I mention that as a present from my parents (mum) this year, I got a bill? I don't really want to rant about it, but it wasn't very nice of her. 

Update on my new Vivos. They are cold. If I'm not wearing thick (smartwool) socks. And when I'm not moving. If the ground is cold, there just isn't much separating my feet from it, so I have to keep moving. Keep friction going. Haven't tried them snowshoeing yet, hopefully this coming weekend. I'm not worried.

Word of the Day

decathect \dee-kuh-THEKT\, verb:
To withdraw one's feelings of attachment from (a person, idea, or object), as in anticipation of a future loss


Before I wrote my 'coming out' letter to my parents, I made sure I was financially stable on my own and I even decathected from them in case the news was not taken well. Even though it wasn't taken well, I needn't have gone so far.

one of my most favorite words

whinge \hwinj\, verb:

To complain; whine.

Whinge is a Northern variant of the Old English word hwinsian meaning, "to whine."    

This word is almost onomatopoeia. I have loved it since I first heard it sometime in high school.


Quit yer whinging, Larry! We ent 'ad naught but mouldy bread fer days, neither.

My Weakness

 I don't have an overabundance of gay attributes, but I embody a couple gay stereotypes. One is obvious: the whole liking of men thing. Another is that I'm incredibly fond of new items of clothing. I like to think I'm not a very material sort of person. I try to be fairly minimal, but new stuff is a weakness. Usually, I only get new stuff when I need it.

So, new shoes. I have recently become aware of minimalist footwear, and since I prefer bare feet anyway, it was an easy step to make switching over from traditional footwear. However, it's expensive. But I needed new hiking/winter boots, and I finally found the waterproof Vivos on the Clymb for about half price, so I went for it.

I love them. I cannot wait to try them with gators snowshoeing. I'll need to wear some nice thick socks though, it's bound to be a bit more chilly without so much sole for insulation.

A review of sorts by one who doesn't like to read reviews

There are possible/probable spoilers for The Hobbit here, especially if you're like me and don't like reading reviews before watching the film. 

I watch movies I'm interested in without first (or ever) reading reviews about them. I feel that reading such things before the film makes me think too much about what positives and negatives were previously pointed out.

Thus, I did not read anything about The Hobbit until after seeing it. And it seems that a lot of critics were rather harsh.

I agree that it may have been hyped up a bit much. It's a prequel to one of the highest grossing trilogies of all time, not to mention most Academy Awards. The technology is cutting edge, but you might not actually know that unless they told you. And they did. But I think that technology is supposed to be a support, so not noticing it is actually the point. And yes, Jackson and the team did embellish Tolkien's story quite a bit.  However, not as much with non-canon material so much as delving into extended histories of Middle-Earth. So the film didn't follow the book verbatim, but was supplemented with many things from more obscure works. In this way I think it catered more to the dedicated fans more than the casual viewer.

I loved the extra lore and character depth. I loved the flashbacks. I love New Zealand as a backdrop. And I love Bilbo.

When I was quite young my mom read The Hobbit to my brother and me. Bilbo was always a very dear character to me. And when I read it myself and then went on to The Lord of the Rings, I was actually disappointed that Bilbo was not also the protagonist of LOTR. I found him much more personable and not so afflicted with martyrdom as Frodo.  Martin Freeman certainly did not disappoint as Bilbo. I am very fond of the actor (my car is even named after him.) Though I do wish he'd get done with this Hobbit business and go back to Sherlock.

I really appreciate how they made each Dwarf as unique as possible. It's still hard (impossible?) to keep them all separate, but at least I can tell which is Thorin and also who Fili and Kili are, as they were always my favorite. Also Aidan Turner as Kili is totally hot. I really liked the interactions of Thorin and Bilbo and how their relationship is progressing.

Details I'm glad were added/retained in the Hobbit:

"Is it scrumptious? Is it crunchable?" Gollum says "scrumptiously crunchable" in the book, but it is possibly my favorite Gollum line.

The stone Giants. I wondered if they were too far-fetched for Peter Jackson's version of Middle Earth. After all, they're reminiscent of the rockbiters in Neverending Story. But I liked them nonetheless.

Radagst. He's not actually in the Hobbit book more than just a brief mention, but I always liked him from his brief appearance in The Fellowship of the Ring (book). In this film I'm assuming he's meant to take the place of Beorn, which makes me a bit sad. I enjoy a good skinchanger, especially of the bear variety. I wonder why they figured rock giants were a go, but not skinchangers. Regardless, Radagst serves nearly the same role in the film as Beorn did in the book, but without Gandalf's ingenious introduction of 13 dwarves to him.

The mention of the other two wizards. I like that Gandalf even said he didn't remember the names of the blue wizards. Alatar and Pallando, by the way. They're only mentioned in order to note that they left and no one has seen or heard from them since.
 
I cannot wait to see more of Smaug and the Elves of the Green Wood.
I've yet to go back to see it in 3D- as it was intended to be seen. I can tell that the cinematography would be even more spectacular in this mode.So perhaps I'll write even more later

Oh, and I still want a warg.

EDIT: December 16

I saw The Hobbit in 3D and it was certainly meant to be seen in 3D. Nothing of my review has changed except the fact that Beorn is almost surely going to be in the next film, as that's how the flow of events in the book are and the company seem to have ended up on the Carrock at the end of Unexpected Journey, which I didn't really notice the first time around. So perhaps I should have done a little research before making assumptions. 

I try not to disparage my employment on the internet. I mean, at least I have employment, and I'd like to keep it that way.

But there are some days when I wish I could just leave and never return. I dread coming in five days a week, I really do. There are many reasons. The main one is that I feel wasted. I am in debt for a degree I've yet to use. My brain is slowly turning to soup due to disuse.

Another reason is that this is not necessarily my choice of job anyhow. I applied because I was qualified, and now I am not qualified to do anything but work with animals.

My department is arguably the backbone of the shelter. We do all the cleaning and directly care for every animal. However, it seems that all the other departments think we're just there to clean up their messes. The shelter is changing it's hours, making it so that we have 3 hours fewer each week to finish cleaning before patrons come in. We are under-staffed; not because we don't have it in the budget to hire more people, but because we aren't allowed to do so until summer.

There are several other factors I could add, but I refuse to list names and point fingers more than I already have. What I have written is plenty.

All of this adds up to some very stressed, frustrated and resentful employees. Myself included.

I dislike my situation, but I cannot afford to quit. I need a replacement job that pays at least as much as I'm making. I'm not making heaps, but it's enough. I would like to have a job I actually like, though I'm not actually sure what that would be.

So I continue in this drudgery. And I feel like I'm losing bits of myself to this tired place*.

*Some lyrics from Cold Truth, Guggenheim Grotto

fluffy love

Love is falling from the sky and I haven't any boots.

This is not a metaphor. I'm talking about snow. And it's about damn time!

But seriously, I don't have snowboots. However, I did find a pair of water resistant Vivobarefoot boots for about half price. I can wear them with gators and tear up this fluffy, cold love!

I love winter. I don't much like driving when there's snow, but only because so few people know how to handle it, and I'm constantly on edge for cars sliding through stop signs and the like. And I don't like how dark and short winter days are. Besides that, I love winter more than most things.

I love breathing air so cold it makes my nose hairs stick together. I love when the day-old snow creaks under my feet. I love splashing through fresh powder. I love letting my breath fog my glasses. I love flannel-lined jeans and scarves and warm hats. I love coming in to a warm house and feeling the flush on my cheeks. I love drinking hot chocolate with some irish cream added.

Don't fail me now, snow. Don't be a tease. I'm counting on you to chase these 70 degree days far away.

I think my brain is atrophying. I have been going back and editing posts because I've made stupid typos or spelling errors. Even though I do (usually) proofread before I publish.

I haven't really had to use my brain much in a very long time. I've been out of school for almost five years, and there's little evidence I used my brain even when I was in school.

I try to keep it honed by reading a lot. And by doing sudoku and kakuro puzzles. Occasionally, I engage in a deep and intricate conversation. But I haven't really stretched my brain in ages. I don't know how to actually, it's just bored and it's making me feel slow and daft.

There's just so much going on all the time, and yet I'm almost always bored.

I don't seem to ever have the time to write like I know I need to. I don't have the quiet room. The patience. The attention span. It's like having too much energy, but being forced to stay seated (which also happens to me all too frequently.) I have all of these things inside me that would love to escape onto a page, but I hold them back because it's easier. Or I don't want to deal with it. Or something.

To be honest, I don't know. I don't know anything.

I have no discernible course for my life. All I know is that while it's not actually bad, it's not really what I want.


I need an adventure. I wish I had the energy to go find one.