07 January 2014

Writing has been really hard for me lately. I've been really stuck. I write little blurbs on facebook and tumblr. Bits I mean to expand on here or elsewhere, but I never end up doing it. Everything is just endless repetition. I work. I read at work. I listen to books at work. I hike on the weekends and post photos on the above-mentioned sites (/agentrusco in case you're curious.) After work I eat a mostly healthy dinner. Watch a streamed show. Maybe play a game. Play a bit of conversation. Sleep. Repeat. Endlessly.

My diet is in theory very healthy. Natural as possible, nearly no dairy or breads, lots of vegetables and fiber etc. I have no willpower though, and so I end up eating candy and then chastising myself. Because when I eat candy I don't just have a piece or a bite. I eat it all. Think I'm lying? After Christmas candy went on sale. I bought a bag of those awesome mint nougats. And ate it all in one day. And then I bought a 1 lb package of two huge peanut butter cups. And ate it all within a 24hours. I have no sense of moderation or rationing. And I apparently have no willpower to stop myself from buying such things in the first place. Then there's Fridays. On Fridays a volunteer at my work brings in doughnuts and candy and homemade baked goods. I try to resist. I really do. I avoid the room. I try not to check on what she brings each week. But inevitably I end up sampling a ginger cookie. Or a handful of candy. Or, or, or...

And I feel ill afterwards of course. One would think that would deter me from such things in the future, but never seems to. I am helplessly addicted to sugar. And unfortunately it's all around me all the time.

Anyhow, I didn't really mean for this to be about my sugar habit, but at least I'm writing.

In parting here's a photo from snowshoeing last weekend:

1 comment:

Abby said...

Great photo! I've wanted to try snowshoeing for a while, but haven't gotten around. I think you can rent them? Good luck finding your motivation in the New Year!
Sugar is one thing I've never had a problem with. Just the smallest bit of candy makes me jittery and scatterbrained... at least I think it's the sugar